Welcome back to Consider Yourself Hugged! Click here to listen to Episode 124. OR click YouTube below to watch! (***Disclaimer: I provide these notes as a skeleton for the show - nothing fancy 😄)
Have you ever considered trying something new and you were so excited until... your inner voice screamed you weren't good enough? Today you'll learn how that voice temporarily serves you, why, and how to address it in the future!
I have a story to share with you, and it wasn’t until about 15 minutes ago that I was like BOOM - epiphany! Before I share, please chose a story of your own. The best way to improve your mental & emotional wellbeing is to practice. So, practice with me!
The Story Highlights:
I have been serving in coffee bar in our church for few years. Last week a call for help for media team.
I thought: I do PowerPoints, my podcast, YouTube, Final Cut, etc.
This is right up my alley. Also, they need help. I could learn something.
I chose I time to go and observe. I walked in and the person in charge that day showed me 6 areas: main camera, sound, lights, slides, coordinates, Facebook live.
It took 10 minutes or so to walk through each set up.
IMMEDIATELY I thought to myself um no!
I processed later, but at the time I was like Nope. I’ll continue with the coffee ministry, but I’ll stay here for service today.
As I watched, and asked questions it became so much less complicated.
I was back there for about 1 ½ hours intently watching and it all made sense. I won’t say easy, but doable.
They were laughing, having good time, lots of energy, and I got to see service from a new viewpoint.
I thought: I can do this!
After service, my husband asked How’d it go – did you like it? I said Yeah I think I’ll do it. But in beginning I was like no – you know how I make those snap judgements.
The Processing
Then I thought why? Why do I make those snap judgements? 3 things affected me:
Simply thinking I wasn’t good enough
My age
Being a woman
Fast forward to the next morning, the boom! I was thinking about my self-esteem. (Click here for info on the book )
I realize I did 2 steps.
I decided to try something new.
Within a few minutes, I decided not to do it. Then what happens? RELIEF! Here’s why I titled it How feeling inadequate serves you: Anxiety goes down and you are at peace. For a bit.
What to do
So what do you do? How did I get to a place where I decided to do it? The steps are easy as far as listing them. They aren’t necessarily in order:
Acknowledge what’s happening. This might come later when you reflect and become self aware. I did this 3 times.
Me to tim you know how I am
2nd going through what happened in my head
Specifically acknowledging this is a self esteem issue
Give it time
I honestly didn’t give it time on purpose (interestingly, so no one would think poorly of me for leaving)
Whatever time means – minute, hour, day – before make decision
Reflect during this time. What were you thinking? Mine were
I’m too old
A woman
Can’t do it perfectly
What if I, what if I, what if I....
Reassess = looking back to see if your fears were founded
My thoughts were not accurate.
I even noticed a couple of errors, the world did Not end.
One guy got called out. world did not end
What if he had gotten yelled at? If he’s ok with it.
Do I want to do this like I did before? Am I excited? Can I learn from it and contribute?
Honestly, this could’ve gone the other way! Maybe they were unhappy, hated the work, had low energy, were rude about woman or age. In that case maybe I chose the other way - who knows!
I do hope you will use this information each time you feel yourself feeling inadequate!
Thanks for joining today! As I’ve always asked in the past, please pass the show link along to your friends and subscribe, download, and review wherever you are listening. If you’re a woman and you haven’t joined our private FB group A Place for Women, please do that now! It’ll be your source of encouragement. You can also follow my public page, Tami West Seminars.
And until next time, Consider Yourself Hugged 😘🤗